Words & Deeds

Stop! Turn around! Boise is #2 on Lonely Planet ‘Best in U.S.’ list. Guess who’s #1?

Here we go again ... and again and again and again.

Travel website and magazine Lonely Planet recently released its eighth annual “Best in the U.S” list, and unsurprisingly, Boise, Idaho, was ranked near the top. Idaho’s capital city finished No. 2. We are on all these lists, right?

The No. 1 destination to see in 2018? California’s Redwood Coast, where you can “lose all track of time (and cell signal).”

Wow. It’s official, Californians: You have no reason to move to Boise. My cell signal works most of the time unless I’m driving out past Avimor.

If you’ve already relocated here, plug your Tesla into the wall and start plotting your course back to San Francisco. The experts at Lonely Planet say you should. So do those multilingual yard signs dotting the North End that say “No matter where you are from, we’re glad you’re our neighbor. Except California.”

Aw, I’m kidding. Those signs don’t exist. (Do they?)

Although, seriously, it might be helpful if Californians stopped invading — along with everyone else.

Lonely Planet describes Boise as “what cool looks like before the rest of the world has figured it out.”

We are so past that stage. Is there any “best of” list that hasn’t slobbered on us yet? Lonely Planet must have gotten its definition of “cool” straight from the Fonz, right before he jumped that shark and dragged the state of Idaho into the Pacific Ocean.

Aw, again, I’m just kidding. Apologies for my lateness, by the way. This “Best in the U.S.” list was published last week. I’ve been too busy analyzing the metrics of another list ranking Idaho as America’s third-best outdoor state.

Besides, I’m not sure these list articles are worth mentioning anymore when Boise isn’t crowned rightfully victorious.

California’s Redwood Coast? We got robbed. Who’s your daddy gonna be when you’re fumbling around some boring forest craving the No. 1 city for “cheap beer, weed and a dinner at Buffalo Wild Wings”?

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