Dear Amy: My boyfriend lives an hour away. Hes made several jokes about moving somewhere together, but Im worried that these jokes are actually serious.
Hes a great man. Hes funny, chivalrous and charming, but hes not financially stable. Ive spoken to him about his spending habits several times. Hes slowly understanding the difference between needs and wants.
Ive tried to dodge the subject about moving in together because Im not comfortable cosigning anything if he is unable to keep up with his side of the expenses. I have never been in debt, and my credit is great. I pay all my bills on time.
My friends tell me life is all about risk and that I should live a little. The fear of going into debt or tapping into my savings scares me, but I also dont want to lose him. What should I do?
RUNNING OUT OF TIME
Dear Running: Your friends are right in this respect: You should embrace the risks life throws your way, but in this scenario you should define risk as being brave enough to have a series of conversations with your boyfriend about finances and then making choices about what you are willing to do.
You should definitely live a little. In fact, you should live a lot. But given your prudent financial temperament (good for you), you and this guy seem like a mismatch in an important area.
You should not live with someone who isnt financially stable. Thats why dating is so much fun (even with a fiscal mismatch). Unless you marry or live with this guy, you get the laughs without the financial hangover.
Dear Amy: Animal Lover in Maryland was concerned about two guinea pigs her friend was leaving on a cold porch.
I had a friend who was planning to get a dog for his sons, and when I asked where the dog would sleep, he said, In the backyard. Ill make him a doghouse.
Amy, we live in Denver, where it can get extremely cold for extended periods. I convinced him not to get a dog.
Dear DL: You did a good deed by speaking up!