Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Carolyn: My husband and I fight about food, constantly.

I grew up with fresh food. He grew up with chips and a candy bar as an integral part of every meal.

It wasn’t a big deal when we first got together, but I’ve since changed a lot (vegetarian, but I’ll cook meat for him), and he believes he’s the one making all of the compromises. That’s true, but since they’re for health reasons, I think he should do it and stick around another 50-70 years.

Oh, and our young kids are now VERY aware of what’s on Daddy’s plate versus theirs.

I know I’m being a pain, too, but I’m sick and tired of Husband complaining about what I’m cooking, and the kids screaming for what’s on Daddy’s plate.

I don’t have the energy to make two dinners every night. Any suggestions? Both of us are at healthy weights, but have a lot of diseases in our families that are helped by healthy diets.

FOOD FIGHT

How about a deal: You back off on giving him crap about what he eats, and he doesn’t eat it around the kids.

That leaves the problem’s roots intact, but since your husband apparently doesn’t buy into healthy examples for children(!), you have to anticipate his being too far gone to accept reason.

So, surface will have to do — and if you must settle for one goal, your kids’ relationship with food is the best one.

Re: Food Fight: Wow, this could have been me. We finally resolved it this way: Mom cooks one menu for everyone. Anyone may refuse food, but no complaints allowed. If you don’t like it, don’t eat it and wait till the next meal.

Dad can eat what he wants, in private, if he buys it for himself, or he can cook a square meal of his choosing at any time. It was a fair deal, and eventually he came around.

ANONYMOUS

Sanity! Welcome to the table.

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