Pitiless, puerile, pointless and perfunctory — and those are just the “P’s” — “Underworld: Awakening” was brought into this world to revamp the vampire franchise and prove Kate Beckinsale can still wear the spandex, the leather bustier, the werewolf-kicking boots and the black leather cape of “death dealer” Selene.

But as any fashionista will tell you, just because you can get away with wearing something is no reason to actually do it.

Beckinsale, her mop of gelled, jet-black hair dropped over one luminescent-blue eye, never makes us forget she’s doing this for the paycheck.

She had pretty much walked away from this franchise that made her with the last film, “Rise of the Lycans.” But mommy needs a new pair of shoes.

Here, she awakens from cryogenic sleep to see that 12 years have passed, and her werewolf/vampire lover Michael is gone.

But there is a child (India Eisley) that the surviving werewolves (Lycans) want to get their hands on.

It’s a humorless movie of chases and epic brawls. No time for empathy or character development (Michael Ealy is a sympathetic cop, Theo James a hunky vampire who notices Selene’s outfit) or clever dialogue.

Watching the great Charles Dance try to deliver bad lines with a mouth full of fake teeth is what counts for entertainment here.

The new villain is a scientist (Stephen Rea) who’s been keeping the child he calls “Subject 2” under wraps. The new take, by Swedish directors Bjorn Stein and Mans Marlind, is to show the bites, slashes and arterial spurts in extreme closeup. And in 3-D.

Ewww.

For Beckinsale’s sake, let’s hope that by the time the “Total Recall” remake opens with her in it this summer that we’ve all forgotten the lapse in judgment that “Awakening” was.